Tag Archives: Xposure Photos

Why People *Really* Watch DWTS

10 Apr

Those who do well on Dancing with the Stars aren’t the people who are light on their feet. They’re the ones whose weight loss we can document over the weeks of the competition. Think Kirstie Alley, Kelly Osbourne and Marie Osmond. That’s why we really tune in.

The Daily Mail is no different from anyone else. Or rather, they encourage everyone else to tune in for the weight loss. In this story, they report on contestant Katherine Jenkins’ drastic slim-down. She’s apparently lost about 15 lbs, even though she had a perfectly lovely shape to begin with.

Because the mezzo soprano is a sensible gal, she says she hopes not to lose more.

Source: Daily Mail

Writer: Emily Sheridan

Photos: Xposure Photos

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“Chubby Cheeks” Cole-No-More

9 Apr

Since Cheryl dropped the “Cole” from her name and officially declared independence, the English tabs have been waiting for her to mess up. The Daily Mail thinks they nabbed her with a photo taken from a strange angle, which suggests she has a “rounder face.”

The headline also promises a “fuller figure,” but that comes into question when you actually take a look at the photos.

Either I’m too far-sighted to see the difference between the “before” and “after” shots, or writer Simon Neville’s standards for skinny are extraordinarily high.

This is what Cheryl looks like when she gives fat face.

Source: Daily Mail

Writer: Simon Neville

Photos: Xposure Photos, Flynet Pictures

Happy Easter! While You Were Hunting Chocolate…

8 Apr

Forgive the two-day hiatus. We don’t observe Easter at The Scrawn, but we’ll sure as hell take the days off.

This weekend, repeat offender Daily Mail did what it does best: remind you that you cannot afford a personal trainer. Splashed across its homepage are various headlines accompanied by pictures of women in bikinis. The Daily Mail writers had to put in a double-shift to make these pieces came across as legitimate news stories.

Here, the Daily Mail reports on model Kate Upton’s provocative bunny video for The Love Magazine.

When Brooklyn Decker revealed the details of her romance with husband Andy Roddick, the Daily Mail drew us in with this picture.

Apparently, when successful film producer Rita Rusic sports a bikini in Miami Beach, it’s for the sole purpose of pleasing her much younger fiancé. Quoth the Daily Mail: “She showed off an enviable figure for her age…”


Jennifer Ellison: glamour model, Dancing on Ice contestant, and, because the Daily Mail won’t let it die, mother of two.

And finally, the Daily Mail snagged as many production stills as it could from Nicki Minaj’s latest video. Most notable among them was the one where she wears next to nothing while her collaborator, rapper 2 Chainz, remains fully clothed.

Photos: The Love Magazine, Optic Photos, Flynet Pictures, Xposure Photos, Universal Music

Christina Aguilera Doesn’t Go To Restaurants Naked

4 Apr

Perhaps to make sure Christina Aguilera is not straying from her quest to please the media with an acceptable body, the Daily Mail followed her to a restaurant. There, they noted, she not only ate real food, she also wore a dress that suited her shapely physique.

Because it’s astonishing that a fatty can look good in clothing, critical reporter Andrea Magrath made it a point to demonstrate that Aguilera’s frock “was more alluring than it seemed at first glance.” Adding that, “the two-tone dress created a flattering silhouette for the curvy star.”

Keeping track of Aguilera’s progress, the Daily Mail duly posted pictures that clearly mark the singer’s weight loss. Indictment or encouragement? History will decide.

Source: Daily Mail

Author: Andrea Magrath

Photos: Splash News, Xposure Photos

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UPDATE: It seems the Daily Mail weren’t the only ones stalking Christina. Cele|Bitchy were also on the scene and dug a little deeper into the story:

“…Christina is looking SO MUCH better, right? She’s lost a little weight, she bought a new dress that fits (sort of), she decided to wear some ‘foundation garments’ (Spanx), and her hair and makeup is notably improved. Of course, her boobs are still kind of out of control, but isn’t it nice to see them harnessed in and supported? Is this the start of a whole new Christina? I will be very happy if her days as a hot mess are over.”