Tag Archives: Splash News

It’s Audrina’s Birthday!

10 May

But more importantly, how does she look in a bikini? That’s the only question on Us Magazine‘s mind when celebrities age.

You’re almost 30, Audrina. And you know what happens after 30? Not BBQs, I tell you what.

Source: Us Magazine

Photo: Splash News

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The Threshold on Curves

14 Apr

Let’s get something straight. The Daily Mail “likes” “curves” (wrap your mind around those quotation marks). But there’s a bloody limit! How dare actress Natalie Cassidy wear form-fitting “skinny” jeans that aren’t black?

To be perfectly fair, the Daily Mail doesn’t actually call her “fat.” But they strongly imply it by saying that Cassidy “squeezes herself into a pair of tight-fighting bottoms,” that they accentuate her “larger bottom,” and that her “ill-advised” jeans did “little to complement her figure.”

Their advice to Cassidy? “Natalie should have attempted to dress up her figure a little.” In other words, wear a potato sack until she’s presentable.

Source: Daily Mail

Writer: Daily Mail Reporter

Photo: Splash News

Why Ashley Judd Should Replace Me as Editor of The Scrawn

9 Apr

In this most eloquent piece, Ashley Judd addresses the media flurry caused by her “puffy” appearance last month.

The gossipers lynched her for being on steroids, having plastic surgery, getting older or gaining weight, sometimes a variation of two or more of these. “We won’t even address how extraordinary it is that a size eight would be heckled as ‘fat,'” she says.

She rightfully calls out picking apart women’s bodies for its inherent misogyny. Ironically, she points out, women are largely the ones doing the picking apart. And if you think it’s hogwash, consider that Liz Raftery wrote about it for People, Debbie Emery represented for Radar Online, perennial favourite Ariana Finlayson was on top of it for Us Magazine, and Cara Harrington covered it for Hollywood Dame.

Judd asks, “Why was a puffy face cause for such a conversation in the first place? How, and why, did people participate?” I wonder how the media would respond. I bet they simply won’t. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t.

Photo: Wenn, Splash News

Christina Aguilera Doesn’t Go To Restaurants Naked

4 Apr

Perhaps to make sure Christina Aguilera is not straying from her quest to please the media with an acceptable body, the Daily Mail followed her to a restaurant. There, they noted, she not only ate real food, she also wore a dress that suited her shapely physique.

Because it’s astonishing that a fatty can look good in clothing, critical reporter Andrea Magrath made it a point to demonstrate that Aguilera’s frock “was more alluring than it seemed at first glance.” Adding that, “the two-tone dress created a flattering silhouette for the curvy star.”

Keeping track of Aguilera’s progress, the Daily Mail duly posted pictures that clearly mark the singer’s weight loss. Indictment or encouragement? History will decide.

Source: Daily Mail

Author: Andrea Magrath

Photos: Splash News, Xposure Photos

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UPDATE: It seems the Daily Mail weren’t the only ones stalking Christina. Cele|Bitchy were also on the scene and dug a little deeper into the story:

“…Christina is looking SO MUCH better, right? She’s lost a little weight, she bought a new dress that fits (sort of), she decided to wear some ‘foundation garments’ (Spanx), and her hair and makeup is notably improved. Of course, her boobs are still kind of out of control, but isn’t it nice to see them harnessed in and supported? Is this the start of a whole new Christina? I will be very happy if her days as a hot mess are over.”