By Hollywood standards, a man like Matthew Rutler deserves a golden shrine and a cult of followers. According to Us Magazine, Christina Aguilera’s boyfriend loves her, lock, stock and barrel.
“I love my body. My boyfriend loooooves my body. My son is healthy and happy, so that’s all that matters to me,” Lady Aguilera told Marie Claire magazine.
To remind us why this merits any mention at all, Us treats us to a whole slideshow on Aguilera’s body, from her itty-bitty teenage frame to her voluptuous adult figure. They tell us it’s her “Body Evolution,” but it might as well be called “From Skinny to Not in 13 Photos.”
Source: Us Magazine
Photos: Getty Images
This isn’t exactly news, but it bears repeating. Last year, Giuliana Rancic told the HuffPo that LeAnn Rimes looked “a little thin.”
In a most appropriate response, Rimes invited Rancic to talk it out over lunch. Rancic, on a strict no-solid-food diet, preferred to settle the matter over drinks.
Can't we all just get along?
Now they’re BFFs.
Source: The Huffington Post
Photo: Getty Images
It’s a good thing the blog this comes from is called The Superficial, otherwise there might be some confusion.
I can’t tell which is worse: That this piece commends Aguilera for wearing horizontal stripes now that she’s “noticeably smaller,” or that her weight gain causes Adam Levine to sleep “in fear each night that he’ll wake up discovering a new definition of pain and suffering as he’s slowly digested over thousands of years.” Regardless of her weight, one commenter still finds her “porkable.”
The Superficial likes to cover this kind of story from every angle, so they made sure the slideshow featured 22 whole photos of Aguilera’s striped dress.
Because at the end of the day, how dare she?
Source: The Superficial
Photo: Getty Images
Ever notice how women and men in classic paintings were a little rotund? That’s because they were rich enough to hire an artist to paint their portrait. Money also meant you could eat. And eating was the kind of thing that caused paupers to covet their neighbours.
Leave it to TMZ to devote a whole slideshow to celebrities who finally made enough money to eat three square meals a day.
TMZ wasn’t the only media outlet to treat celebrity weight gain with such finesse. Us magazine also jumped on board with a slightly different angle. It looked like they were on the celebrities’ side, too, until they picked the most unappealing photos for their slideshow.
Same shit, slightly shittier?
Sources: TMZ, Us Magazine
Photos: Getty, Wire Image
Few celebrities have come under as much scrutiny over their weight than Christina Aguilera. It’s true that she used to be super-skinny, but I wonder if she’s really that fat now?
Call me crazy, but I don't even think she's plump.
Honestly, she looks like most women who aren’t celebrities. She’s more full-figured than before, but she’s hardly portly. And then Kelly Osbourne – who really should know better – got on Christina’s case.
Dear Kelly Osbourne: When you called Christina Aguilera fat because she did the same to you when you were heavier, did you remember to give Karma a pink slip?
Sources: The Blemish, Star Magazine, Us Magazine
Photos: Getty Images & Wire Image